when mcdonalds accidentally gives you an extra chicken nugget
if i was trapped inside a room filled with explosives and the only way out was to eat a whole tomato i would die
“Superman dat hoe.” -Soulja Boy
dumb story because i think i’m funny
we were watching a movie in school and there was a scene where this guy was driving over lava and they kept showing close up shots of the tires catching on fire and i started laughing and my friend kept asking me what was so funny and when i finally composed myself i took a deep breathe and whispered
‘hot wheels’
i want pizza but im broke what if i just walked into a shop and stole a 12 inch pizza and ran away do u think id get away with it
update: i got away with it
omg no dont reblog this post what if the police find me
hello yes police there’s someone on the internet who stole a pizza and got away with it
r u trying 2 get me put in jail u asshole
nothing grape flavored is flavored like grapes it’s just flavored like other grape flavored things and this is why I have trust issues
FUN FACT: Grape artificial flavor was the first artificial flavor created, by accident. That means that some guy decided, “Whoa, this smells a lot like grapes,” and now everyone pretends it’s grape-y, too…
It tastes like an accident
why does leonardo dicaprio always end up dead in the water with no girlfriend
I think it’s in his contract, old sport
